Website Terms of Use

Use of this website is offered to you on your acceptance of these Terms of Use. Your use of this website or of any content presented in any and all areas of the website indicates your acknowledgment and agreement to these Terms of Use. If you do not agree to be bound by and comply with all of the foregoing, you may not access the website.
As the owner of this website, I have the right, at my sole discretion, to modify, add or remove any terms or conditions of these Terms of Use without notice or liability to you. Any changes to these Terms of Use shall be effectively immediately following the posting of such changes on this website.

This site is bullsh*t

This website is for informational purposes only. It is provided to you solely for your own personal, non-commercial use. You may link to and refer to this website freely. I absolutely do not guarantee the accuracy, timeliness, reliability or completeness of any of the information contained on, downloaded or accessed from this website.

Most (if not all) of what is on this website is simply made up and should be treated as such. Don't blame me for your own propensity for believing everything you read.

Privacy Policy

I Do Not Care About Your Personal Information

I make no efforts whatsoever to safeguard the privacy of the information you provide me, period.

Confidentiality and Transmissions over the Internet

I do not assume any liability for any damage you may experience or costs you may incur as a result of any transmissions over the Internet or other publicly accessible networks, such as transmissions involving the exchange of e-mail with me (including those which may contain your personal information - see preceding section). If you don't like this, what are you doing on the internet?

In no event will the information you provide to me through this website be deemed to be confidential, create any fiduciary obligations to you on my part, or result in any liability to you on my part in the event that such information is inadvertently released by me or accessed by third parties without our consent.

If it's here, it belongs to me

All submissions to this website via email or otherwise becomes my property to make life easier... on me. You accept this and live with it. It's too much work otherwise. By uploading, posting or otherwise transmitting through or to our website or mail servers any content, you grant to me, my successors and assigns, a non-exclusive, world-wide, royalty free, perpetual, non-revocable licence to use or distribute such content in any manner, as stated in my Privacy Policy.

Complaint Policy

The performance of this website and all information contained on, downloaded or accessed from this website are provided to you on an "as is" basis, without warranties of any kind whatsoever, including any implied warranties or warranties of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose or non-infringement of the rights of third parties. If something weird happens to your computer because you accessed this website, you cannot blame me in any way. I will tolerate one nasty note and nothing more.

The only exception to this is that you are allowed to send a second email of complaint only on the following condition: you must send me verifiable video footage of you standing in the middle of a busy city street, naked and shouting the words: "I am not insane! Robots eat squeaky toys for fuel!" You must do this for one hour or until your arrest.

This Site May Change, Or Not, At Any Time

I reserve the right to modify, disable access to or discontinue, temporarily or permanently, any part or all of this website or any information contained thereon without liability or notice to you. I tell you this for no particular reason since you cannot do much about it anyway.

At Your Own Risk

As a visitor to this website, you acknowledge and agree that any reliance on or use by you of any information available on this website shall be entirely at your own risk. In no event shall Owner nor any of its data providers, friends, allies or hangers-on be liable for any direct, indirect, consequential or exemplary damages arising from the use or the performance of this website.

You must pay me if you send me spam

You agree to follow all applicable laws and regulations when using this website and further agree that you will not transmit junk mail, chain letters, or other unsolicited bulk e-mail or duplicative messages to any email address listed on this site without agreeing to pay to Michael Fergusson the sum of US$10,612.23 per item. By sending any of the above listed communications to any email address listed on the site, you indicate your agreement to pay said fee.

Indemification by User

You agree to indemnify, defend and hold me and my friends, spouse, children, and agents harmless from any loss, liability, claim, demand, damage, or expense (including any legal fees) asserted by any third party relating in any way to your use of this website or breach of these Terms of Use. I reserve the right to assume the exclusive defense and control of any matter subject to indemnification by you, which shall not excuse your indemnity obligations. In other words, find someone else to sue.

Third Parties and Links

No matter how much I say I love this site, consider it Bullshit (see section 2, "This Site is Bullshit" above). As far as you are concerned, links or pointers to other websites and references to products and services offered by third parties are provided to you for convenience only and do not constitute an endorsement or approval by me of (i) the organizations that operate such websites; (ii) the content, privacy policies or other terms of use on such websites; or (iii) such third party products and services. As I have no control or responsibility over websites or content maintained by other organizations, or for products and services offered by third parties, I do not assume any liability for your use of any of the foregoing, which use you acknowledge and agree shall be at your own risk.

Proprietary Rights

My policy is to comply with all intellectual property laws and to act quickly upon receiving any notice of claimed infringement. If you believe that your work has been reproduced on this website in a manner that constitutes copyright infringement, please let me know immediately by sending email to michael[at]fergusson.net.

General

If any provision of these Terms of Use is held invalid or unenforceable in any respect by any court having competent jurisdiction, such provision shall be enforced to the maximum extent permitted by law, and the remaining provisions of these Terms of Use shall continue in full force and effect. No waiver of any provision of these Terms of Use shall be deemed a further or continuing waiver of such provision or any other provision of these Terms of Use.

Jurisdiction

These Terms of Use shall be governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of the State of Virginia and the laws of the United States of America. The parties consent to the exclusive jurisdiction at a place to be determined by Owner at any time, up to and including the last minute.